i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
