we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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