Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
