We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
