See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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