he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
