We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
