I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize
