What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
