maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize
