so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
