shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
