But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
