your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Randomize
