Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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