I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
