Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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