Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
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