I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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