He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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