I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
