I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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