remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
