Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
