I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
