yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
