And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
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