Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
