i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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