Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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