if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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