Can i not drive my cunt home
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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