Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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