I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize