I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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