I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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