is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i will never coherently bang her
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
