She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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