this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
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