i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
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