Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
