There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
