so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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