wat bout pragnant strippers??
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
sex in a hospital.. check
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize