Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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