I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
