Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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