One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
