Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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