great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
