everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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